


Comfort and Joy

by Kleineganz



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Boys Kissing, Confessions, First Kiss, Fluff, Holidays, M/M, Saturnalia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 11:07:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17140652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kleineganz/pseuds/Kleineganz
Summary: Cullen finds Dorian at the Herald's Rest, crying into his goblet over Kaaras and The Iron Bull celebrating Saturnalia together. He surprises Dorian with a confession of his own.





	Comfort and Joy

 

Cullen rubbed his eyes as elven bells rang. _Maker it’s late_. Realizing he had missed dinner again, he pushed back the reports on his desk and sighed. _I should eat something,_ he decided as he straightened up and headed down to the Herald’s Rest. Some stew and a mug of their Ferelden ale would do him some good.

As he entered the tavern, Cullen was surprised how empty it was. The Iron Bull was not in his usual chair, and the rest of the Chargers seemed to have also dispersed. Even Maryden had retired for the evening. There were a couple of serving girls flitting about and Cabot still tended bar, serving the only patron to be seen—Dorian.

Smirking and shaking his head, Cullen went to join his occasional chess rival. “So, what are you sulking about this time?” Cullen teased as he sat next to the mage.

Dorian looked up at him with red rimmed eyes, his kohl hopelessly smeared. “I don’t sulk,” Dorian insisted before sighing deeply. “Oh, who am I kidding…”

“What’s wrong?”

“You wouldn’t understand,” Dorian shrugged, as he took a drink of the goblet of wine in front of him.

“Try me.”

Staring at him for a long moment, Dorian tilted his head toward one of the tables in the corner. “Well, alright, but let’s talk somewhere a bit more private, if you don’t mind.”

Cabot scoffed at him. “Like he hasn’t been crying about it all night already.”

“Do you have any stew left?” Cullen inquired. “I fear I missed the dinner bell again.”

“Yeah, I always keep some just for you, Commander. I’ll bring it out with your ale.”

“Thank you,” Cullen said with a grateful smile. “You’re Maker sent.”

Getting up from his stool, he made his way over toward the table where Dorian was now sitting.

“So, tell me what’s troubling you,” Cullen said as he sat across from the mage.

“Well, you know it’s no secret that the Inquisitor and Iron Bull are … close,” Dorian began.

Cullen grimaced. “Ugh, don’t remind me. I walked in on them once…”

“Oh my, that must have been a sight.”

“It was. It nearly blinded me…”

They both laughed, and Cullen saw a little bit of the light return to Dorian’s eyes. That made Cullen smile. Seeing Dorian upset bothered him more than he had realized until this moment.  

Cabot came by to serve Cullen his late dinner and refill Dorian’s goblet. He even left the remainder of the bottle on the table. “Thank you, my good man.”

Cabot grunted and went back to the bar.

Taking another drink from his goblet, Dorian studied Cullen as he ate his stew.

“You work far too hard, Commander,” Dorian observed. "The bags under your eyes are beginning to develop bags of their own."

“After all the chess we’ve played together you can call me Cullen, and you’re changing the subject.”

“Am I? I suppose I am. What were we discussing again?” Dorian asked in feigned ignorance.

“Whatever has gotten you so upset that you were practically weeping into your wine,” Cullen reminded him.

“Oh, yes, that. Well, you see … I happened to overhear our Inquisitor making plans for Saturnalia next week. He was asking Leliana to help him find the perfect gift for his _Kadan_.”

“You fancy him, don’t you?”

“Who? The Inquisitor? Don’t be absurd—”

“Don’t deny it. Why else would that upset you so? I saw how you looked at him, and I recall that you and The Iron Bull had been flirting quite a bit as well. Now that they are together…”

“Yes, alright. You’ve found me out. I can’t deny that I fancied them both at one time, especially Kaaras. He’s so tall and strapping, and he’s been so Maker-damned kind to me … it was foolish of me to hope.” Dorian picked up his goblet and fell silent again.

Finishing his meal and taking a swig of his ale, Cullen allowed himself a moment to study the mage. Their friendship had blossomed over their mutual love of a good game of chess … even if Dorian cheated half of the time. Despite that, Cullen had grown quite fond of the man, and that thought made him chuckle.  

“What’s so funny?”

“I was thinking about how far I’ve come from when I was a Templar. Back in Kirkwall, I wouldn’t have been caught dead enjoying the company of a mage … Maker-forbid one from Tevinter.”

“From what I’ve heard, I think your Knight-Commander would have run us both through on the spot.”

Cullen frowned at the memory. “You’re not wrong about that. Either that or you would have been made tranquil and I would have been kicked out of the order and ended up like Samson, begging for lyrium dust in the streets.”

“I cannot imagine a strapping young Templar like yourself turned out to beg in the streets,” Dorian mused, giving Cullen an appreciative glance. “It’s such a shame you don’t swing that way.”

Cullen raised an eyebrow. “Swing what way? Having an attraction to the same sex? Who said I didn’t?”

Dorian blinked at him in surprise. “Everyone _knows_ you turned Kaaras down flat back in Haven, so I just assumed…”

“Yes, well … Haven was a stressful time. The breach was right above us, I was trying my damnedest to get our troops into shape, and well … the Inquisitor just isn’t my type.”

“So, what exactly is your type?”

Shrugging, Cullen took another pull of his ale. “Less tall and broad, for starters. He’s also not someone I find easy to talk to.”

“Admit it, you’re not attracted to Qunari.”

Cullen's cheeks felt heated as he nodded.

“Well, at least I didn’t have to worry about you also being a rival for his affections,” Dorian said with a chuckle.

Cullen’s face heated further as his stomach turned into knots and he nervously rubbed the back of his neck. “Well yes, you wouldn’t have had to worry about me wanting to steal Kaaras from you if … well but perhaps Kaaras might have had to worry … _Oh, Maker_.  I just want you to know that … well … heh … _well normally_ … I find you very easy to talk to…”

“My dear Comm— _Cullen_ —are you confessing an attraction for me? When I’m in this wretched looking state no less?” Dorian asked as he reached out and put a hand onto his.

Squeezing Dorian’s hand, he nodded. “I suppose I am. I know you seem to prefer the … taller and more muscular type … but if you’re interested?”

Dorian squeezed his hand back and just stared, studying him more closely. _Maker, it felt good to feel his touch._

“Speechless, I see?” Cullen teased.

“You have caught me completely off-guard, and that’s not an easy feat. While I was busy mooning over those two ox-men, here you were all along … letting me cheat you at chess no less.”

Cullen’s heart raced, even as he smiled at Dorian. “So, where do we go from here?”

“If we were back in Tevinter, I’d just take you to bed and ravish you, but…”

“But?”

“Well, we’re not in Tevinter and … the way Adaar and Bull openly flaunt their relationship, and no one blinks an eye? I … I have always wanted more than just a quick fling. In Tevinter I could never hope for more. I’d have been foolish to. But here?”

“Here, we don’t judge who you love,” Cullen replied, noting how Dorian’s eyes were welling with emotion.

“You have just turned my entire world upside down. Tonight, I thought I was just going to drown my sorrows and pass out for a few hours.”

“And now?”

“You’ve given me a spark of hope and … I’ll admit it frightens me a bit.”

Cullen’s heart fluttered. “If it makes you feel any better, it frightens me a bit too. Why don’t we take it slow and see where this goes?”

“That sounds … nice,” Dorian agreed. “May I walk you back to your office? It would be a shortcut for me to get back to my own if I went that way.”

Draining their drinks, they both stood and made their way out of the tavern, waving their good nights to Cabot. Once outside, Cullen took Dorian’s hand in his as they made their way up toward the battlements. Cullen’s heart continued to hammer in his chest as Dorian led him toward his quarters, and then turned them to look over the battlements at the valley below. “It’s amazing how peaceful everything is, this late at night. You could almost pretend there wasn’t a war going on.”

Staring at Dorian, Cullen marveled as the moonlight highlighted the sharp features of mage’s face, making them stand in sharp relief. Without even thinking he reached up to caress his cheek. Dorian leaned into the touch and met his gaze. “Careful, or this won’t go very slow at all,” Dorian said, the scent of wine strong on his breath.

Cullen smirked. “You’re right but … there’s no harm in a good night kiss, is there?”

Dorian’s eyes sparkled as he smiled back at him. “I suppose not.”

Their lips met, and Cullen lost all sense of time. Dorian’s lips were soft and warm against his, and his heart soared as the mage wrapped his arms around him, pulling him closer. After they parted, Dorian looked at him softly. “I could get used to this.”

“So could I,” Cullen confessed, taking Dorian’s hand once more and making their way into his office. “As tempted as I am to take you up to my loft, I think we should leave it here for tonight.”

“Yes, I suppose you’re right,” Dorian agreed. “However, I think one more peck on the lips is at least warranted, don’t you?”

Cullen smiled as he pulled Dorian into another lingering embrace, enjoying the heady taste of wine on his lips. He didn’t dare deepen the kiss further, as much as he wanted to. When he finally was able to tear himself away, he couldn’t help one playful kiss to Dorian’s nose before he stepped back.

“Good night, Dorian.”

“Good night, and sleep well, Cullen.”

For the first time in a months, Cullen did.

***

Dorian’s heart fluttered as he made his way to Cullen’s office. It was Saturnalia and he’d bought the man a gift. Giving a gift to a friend was expected, and he had gotten gifts for several people he counted as friends in Skyhold. However, he was worried that his gift would not be well received by the Commander. Their relationship was so new, and Dorian felt so out of his depths. One misstep and it could all end ... and that's the last thing he wanted.

Knocking as he entered, he found Cullen hunched over his desk as usual. He closed the door behind him before he approached. “I thought I’d find you here, slaving away as usual. I’ve come to fetch you to the festivities.”

Cullen looked up and smiled. “It seems that I’ve lost track of time again. Let me go freshen up and then I’ll come and join everyone.”

“Before you do … I have a little something for you. It’s rather personal so, I thought I’d give it to you in private,” Dorian said as he put down a small parcel in front of Cullen.

“What is this?” Cullen asked as he picked it up, his face quickly turning red. “I … _oh Maker_ , I should have gotten you something…”

Dorian rounded the desk and pulled Cullen into his arms before he could start flailing nervously. “Hush. You know very well the spirit of Saturnalia isn’t about expecting a gift, it’s about giving something to those you care about. You’ve already given me a wonderful gift … even if this,” Dorian gestured between them. “Even if this never goes anywhere, you have given me a measure of joy this past week that I never dreamt I’d find. That is enough of a gift for me.”

Tilting his head to touch his forehead to Dorian’s, Cullen sighed happily. “You’re right. Thank you, Dorian.”

Cullen gave Dorian a quick kiss before stepping back and picking up the parcel. When he opened it, he gasped in surprise as he pulled out the ring to study it more closely. “This is exquisite.”

“I had Dagna forge it to my exact specifications. I thought a golden lion with ruby eyes would suit you well,” Dorian explained.

“Dagna? Do you mean...?”

“Put it on and find out,” Dorian said as he studied Cullen’s expression. As the man slipped off the glove from his hand and slid on the ring, an almost immediate change happened. The pained crease of his brow and the tension of his shoulders were noticeably eased.

“ _Maker_ … what kind of ring is this?” Cullen asked as he admired it.

“I hope it gives you a measure of comfort. I had Dagna use her unique skill. This ring should help ease your symptoms of lyrium withdrawal, and it should also minimize your nightmares as well,” Dorian explained.

Cullen looked at him in surprise. “Wait … how did you know?”

“I’ve long suspected. You always look so pained and tense. You also don’t reek of lyrium like the other former Templars we have in our service. I merely confirmed it with Cassandra and did a bit of research before going to Dagna with the problem.”

“I haven’t felt this good in … such a long time,” Cullen said as he pulled Dorian back into his arms. “Thank you.”

Dorian slid his hand around the back of Cullen’s neck, pulling him closer. “You’re most welcome,” Dorian breathed as he captured Cullen’s mouth in a deep kiss.

“Happy Saturnalia,” Cullen said as he pulled back, a happy glint in his eyes.

“Yes, I do believe this will be a very happy Saturnalia, indeed,” Dorian agreed.

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all my readers! I will try and update my ongoing Fenders fic starting in the new year.


End file.
